The show must go on
by Alexanne2017
Summary: After Alec's death, Jenny is completely broken. Hopefully she is not alone.
1. Chapter 1

**AN:** Hello everyone, it's my first fanfiction and english is not my first language. I hope you'll enjoy it.

«I'm so sorry, but he didn't make it»

The entire world stopped for a moment.

«No I was here this afternoon, he was fine» protested Jenny refusing to believe what the nurse told her

«We did everything we could, I'm truly sorry for your lost» added the nurse

«I need to phone» was all Jenny could say

«Of course. There is one over there»

The young midwife composed Nonatus House's number.

«Nonatus House» answered a voice Jenny recognised instantly

«Cynthia I'm at the hospital, something happened…»

When she saw Cynthia's face after hanging up Chummy knew she had learned bad news.

«What is it Cynthia? Who was it?»She asked concerned

«It was Jenny. Alec is dead.» She answered in a weak voice

Chummy gasped and said «Oh No. Poor Jenny!»

«I will go to the hospital» said Cynthia

«Of course do you want me to ask Peter to take you there?» Asked Chummy worried for her friend and ready to do anything to help her

«Please I don't think Jenny could make it back on foot» said the nurse

While Cynthia and Peter collected Jenny at the hospital, Chummy had tuned in Sister Evangelina on what had happened. Both were waiting anxiously for the three adults to return. Finally, they heard the front door open and went to them. Evangelina's heart broke when she saw what state Jenny was in. Poor child, she looks like she's about to faint, thought the nun. She walked to the young nurse, fortunately she did because as soon as she reached the shattered woman she collapsed.

«It's all right I've got you» she said putting one arm around Jenny's waist preventing her from falling. After a moment, Evangelina, still holding Jenny, turned her head toward Chummy's husband «Thank you very much Agent Noakes, it was very kind of you to bring her back» which made him flush

«It's nothing, you don't turn your back on family» he answered

Evangelina smiled, I think I really misjudged the man she thought. Then she looked at Cynthia

«Nurse Miller go to the kitchen and make some hot coco, I will take Nurse Lee to her room».

«Yes sister» answered Cynthia before making her way to the kitchen fallowed by Chummy and Peter.

Sister Evangelina guided Jenny to the stairs. On the way to the young nurse's bedroom, the nun was wondering what to do. Even though she seemed to be a hot tempered woman, sister Evangelina was as kind-hearted as she was grumpy. She may not show it often but she deeply cared for the nurses, and she had a soft spot for each of them. When they arrived at Jenny's room, the girl could barely stand. Sister Evangelina helped her to bed, after what she turned around, but before walking out, she said

«Nurse Lee, If you need anything you only have to ask» she heard a weak voice answering her back «Thank you sister»

Smiling sadly she walked out and closed the door, she didn't leave right away though. She felt sorry for the girl, losing someone you love is one, if not, the worst thing to live through. Tears formed into her eyes, death was a nasty business.

After a minute or two, she wiped her face and went down to the kitchen.

It was nearly supper time, when Sister Julienne and Trixie made it back to Nonatus house after a long delivery. Trixie announced their arrival while she and the nun made their way to the dinning room «Good afternoon everyone, we are….» She stopped in the middle of her sentence at the sight before her. Cynthia, Sister Evangelina, Sister Monica Joan and Sister Winifred were silent and grave looking. Sister Julienne was suspicious, usually diner times at Nonatus house were far from peaceful and quiet.

«What's going on?»Asked the nun and seeing someone was missing she added «and where is Nurse Lee» her question was met by a heavy silence which made her frown in concerne

«Will someone please tell me what's going on?» She insisted. Finally, Cynthia started to explain

«Something happened today»

«What?» Asked Trixie who was starting to be annoyed, she just came out from a laborious delivery for goodness sake.

«Earlier this afternoon we received a call from the hospital» continued the nurse her head bowed

Trixie instaniasly made the connection between Jenny's absence and the call, panic rose into her chest. Did something happened to Jenny?

«Did something happened to nurse Lee?»Asked Sister Julienne worried about her charge

«No no no no Jenny is fine» Cynthia answered quickly «well kind of» added the young nurse

«What do you mean Kind of?» Asked Trixie harshly making Cynthia wince, the blond was always aggressive when afraid.

Seeing where things were going, and wanting to spare Nurse Miller, Sister Evangelina opened her mouth for the first time «Alec is dead» Silence fell upon the room.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2:

«Dear lord!» murmured Sister Julienne her hand flying to her heart. «Alec is dead» reapeted Trixie not believing what she just heard. They all had been shaken by the young man's accident and hoped that all he would lose in that nasty fall was his foot. Plus Jenny had visited him at the beginning of the afternoon and he seemed fine, well not fine but alive and going to stay that way. Trixie sank into the nearest chair letting the news make it's way through her mind, the delivery she came back from completely forgotten. «How did it happened? He was supposed to be fine after his operation» continued the blond nurse. Cynthia, who had been shaken by Trixie's reaction earlier, answered her question «Apparently there were complications due to the multiple factures, I don't know all the details I was more preoccupied by Jenny» Hearing the nurse's name Sister Julienne snapped back into reality «Where is she?» her voice full of concerned for the young woman, She must be devastated, reasoned the nun. «I took her upstairs when she arrived, the poor child nearly fainted» explained Sister Evangelina sadly «then nurse Miller brought her a cup of coco and something to eat, we didn't see her since». At those words Trixie made an attempt to get up in order to run to her grieving friend, but Sister Julienne beat her to it «I will go to her nurse Franklin, you had a difficult afternoon as well» said the nun before leaving the dinning room which became silent once more.

When Sister Julienne arrived in front of her young charge's door she couldn't hear a thing. She breathed in, not knowing what to say to the girl. Nothing will be able to ease her pain for the time being, she thought while knocking.

«Nurse Lee» no answer, Sister Julienne tried again «Jenny may I come in?» still no answer. Too concerned to just walk away, the midwife opened the door. What she saw made her heart skiped a bit. Jenny Lee was prostrated on the floor, motionless. «Jenny» exclaimed Sister Julienne kneeling next to the young woman, fearing she had fainted. She put her hands on Jenny's shoulders «Jenny, Jenny can you hear me?». The girl slowly raised her head and turned on her side to look at her. The nun's heart shattered upon seeing her charge's pale and tears streamed faced. She managed a feable «Why? Why sister» before brusting into heavy sobs. Sister Julienne enveloped Jenny into a motherly embrace «O my dear child. I wish I could give you an answer» she said brushing cercles on her charge's back in an attempt to calm her. «But it's not fair!» wailed Jenny «Why him? he was to young to die!» she was clinging to the nun as if her life depended on it. In a way it is, thought Julienne, nothing she would say could possibly ease the excruciating pain created by a lost. Only time would heal the wound, but now she could only give the nurse help and comfort. Julienne held Jenny against her until she fell asleep in her arms, exhausted by all that had accuered in just one afternoon. She's at peace, at least for now, thought the nun caressing Jenny's head. A knock on the door made her jump a little then whispered «Come in». The worried faces of Cynthia, Trixie, and Sister Evangelina appeared. «How is she?» inquired Trixie in a low voice «She fell asleep, the poor dear is completely worn out» answered Sister Julienne still holding the young woman in a protective way. «Do you think someone should stay with her to night?» asked Cynthia «We could watch over her» aded Trixie desperatly wanting to do something to help her friend. «It's nice for you to offer nurse Franklin, but you had an exhausting day plus you are on duty first thing in the morning and nurse Miller you are on night watch. Sister Evangelina and I will see to her» responded Sister Julienne, warmth spreading into her heart. Jenny is very lucky to have those two, she thought, nonetheless they also needed their rest. Trixie was about to reciprocate, before she could do so Cynthia had dragged her out of the room leaving both sisters to tend to their friend.


	3. Chapter 3

**AN:** I know it's short (sorry for that), but I hope you'll enjoy it.

Chapter 3:

As soon as the door closed, Sister Evangelina knelt next to Sister Julienne, her sight not leaving the sleeping woman in her sister's protective embrace. It took a while before either of them broke the silence.

«What do we do now?» whispered Sister Evangelina

«I don't know» said Julienne.

«You can't stay like this all night, we have to put the poor thing to bed»

«How? We are not strong enough plus we might wake her up and it's the last thing I want to happen. It took hours for her to calm down and fall asleep.» stated Sister Julienne

«We can't just let her sleep on the floor?» reciprocate Evangelina. She understood by the look Julienne send her, that there was no way that she could win this argument. She sighed

«All right all right. Still you can't stay like this.»

«Yes you are right. We could lay her here with her pillow and covers» suggested Julienne

«Do we have an other choice?» groaned Evangelina painfully getting up to her feet.

While she gathered the necessary, she casted occasional glances upon Jenny. She looked so young and vulnerable. Poor girl experiencing a lost in such a horrible way, reasoned the nun. She then put the pillow and the covers next to Sister Julienne. The latter delicately detached the nurse's arms from her waist and afterwords, with her sister's help, layed Jenny upon the improvised bed. Finally they covered her shivering body with a blanket. Now that she was closer, Evangelina could see the tracks made by the still streaming tears. She gently brushed away a brown curl from the young woman's eyes before siting against the wooden bed. Sister Julienne joined her not long after. They remained like this, silently praying, until dawn.


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter 4:

Hopefully the night had been a quiet one. Nobody had to go out in order to bring a child into this world. Cynthia was more then grateful for that, they were all mourning, not the best way to welcome a new life. Around 6 o'clock Sister Winifred took over the phone duty. « _You should go to your room and rest._ _»_ had suggested the young nun. Even though she was exhausted, Cynthia felt she wouldn't be able to sleep. How could she? Alec died just yesterday, and Jenny… Cynthia closed her eyes for a moment. The sorrow she had seen on Jenny's face when she and Peter had collected her at the hospital. She didn't utter a word when they helped her up and took her back to Nonatus house. Returning to reality, Cynthia felt that a hot drink was exactly what she needed. She headed toward the kitchen, expecting to find it empty this early in the morning. She was surprised to see Trixie sitting in one of the chairs, a cup of hot coco in her hands.

«You look as if you hadn't sleep a wink all night» said Cynthia, her usually kind voice tainted by melancholy, taking the seat next to the blond nurse.

«How could I?» muttered Trixie lighting a cigaret «I couldn't stop thinking about…» her face distorted into a somber simply utter his name was unbearable. Alec's death had taken a toll on every inhabitant of Nonatus, sisters and nurses all alike. Thought there grief was great, they all appreciated the young man, none was greater then Jenny's.

«I never saw her like this» murmured Trixie, There was no doubt on who was ''She'' «when she was in sister Julienne's arms, unconscious…» her head was now resting on Cynthia's, both women needing comfort from each other, remaining like this for a while.

«We have to be with her» stated Trixie breaking the embrace.

«Let's go to her room» suggested Cynthia

«Not now ladies» the voice made both nurses nearly fall out of their seats.

«Sister Julienne! How long have you been here» exclaimed Trixie «You scared the day light out of us» aded Cynthia

The nun slowly entered the kitchen. When passed a ray of sun shine, the young nurses could see dark circles benith the Mother superior's eyes, whiche were also red, as if she had been crying. Sister Julienne give them a sad smile.

«I'm sorry to have startelled you girls. And to answer your question nurse Franklin I've just arrived» she sat down. Trixie and Cynthia went next to her.

«Sister you look exhausted» pointed out the brunette

«I'm Nurse Miller. Sister Evangelina and I never left Jenny's side. We just left her.» whispered the nun. Cynthia grabbed the tea pott and poured some in a mug before giving it to Sister Julienne.

«Thank you very much my dear» she took a ew sipps, letting the warmth speed trough her aching body. Sitting against a hard wooden bed will do that to you.

«How is she Sister» asked Trixie worried. She had only seen Jenny for a minute or two last night, before she had been dragged out of the room by Cynthia

«Still sleeping, that's why I want you to leave her be for the moment.»

«But Sister…»interjected the young woman

«No Nurse Franklin. Wait until she wakes up» Julienne's tone was a little harsh, she felt guilty for that, she knew the nurse had only her friend's best interests at heart, but Jenny needed to sleep as long as possible.

Trixie was, at first, taken aback by the nun's reaction. She then realised that she was right.

«You are right Sister. I'm sorry»

«No it is I who should be sorry. I know you both care for Nurse Lee, as much as I…We do» said Julienne putting her hands upon Cynthia's and Trixie's «She will need you, and I know you will not fail her».

Trixie and Cynthia looked at each other and smiled.


	5. Chapter 5

The day had been calm, Cynthia went out once but it was a false alarm. It was like all babies in the east end knew it wasn't a good time to come. The clock had just struck 4 when the nurse closed Nonatus's front door. Nearly supper time, she thought happily. With that in mind she made her way to the kitchen where she found Chummy, Trixie, Sister Winifred and Sister Monica Joan all sitting at the table.

«Hi Chummy» said Cynthia

«Oh hi» she got up to greet her friend

«What are you doing here? Where is Fred?» asked the nurse

«Oh Peter is taking care of him. I wanted to see Jenny. No luck with that»

«So I take it that Jenny didn't come out of her room» concluded Cynthia before sitting next to Sister Monica Joan, who had been quiet calm and silent since she learned the tragedy

«No, and her room is out of bound. Sister Julienne's orders!» groaned Trixie between two sips of tea

There was a long silence, suddenly she put down her cup, determination in her eyes, and walked towards the door.

«Trixie! Where are you going?» asked Sister Winifred suspicious

«My head hurts like hell. Sorry sister. I just want to lye down» Trixie smiled with innocence

Out side the house, a storm was forming.

Even though she said she would do so, Sister Julienne barely managed to sleep for an hour or two, she remained in bed starring at the ceiling silently praying. She asked God to bring strength upon their house. We all need it, she thought sadly. Her prayers were disturbed by loud knocks on her door.

«Sister Julienne! Sister Julienne! I know you want to rest but this is urgent!»

It was Trixie. The panic in her voice made Julienne feel fully awake. She opened her door, to find the young nurse on the verge of tears.

«Trixie! What ever is the matter?» asked the nun her hands on her charges shoulders

«It's Jenny!»

«What? What is wrong with her?»

«I went to see her. I know you told us not to, but I had to see if she was alright. I knocked on her door, and when she did not answer I opened it. She was not in her room. I ran downstairs to tell the others and we looked for her in the house, but we couldn't find her»

«Why didn't you come to me sooner?» asked Julienne angrily as she ran to Sister Evangelina's room.

«…thank you agent Noakes» after informing Chummy's husband of Jenny's disappearance, Sister Julienne hung up and joined Cynthia, Trixie, Chummy, Sister Monica Joan, Sister Winifred and Sister Evangelina in the living room.

«So what did he say?» asked the latter as soon as her sister came in.

«He told me we should stay put and wait» Julienne felt so powerless, Jenny was out in this most dreadful weather God knows where.

«We should never have left her alone!» exclaimed Trixie her voice full of anger

«You are right nurse Franklin» whispered Sister Julienne, she knew that the blonde nurse was not mad, just worried, still her words added to her guilt. The nurses were her responsibility.

Silence fell between them only disturbed by the thunder. After what seemed like ages, they heard the door slam. They jumped to their feet and ran hopping to find Jenny. There she was, pale and soaked to the bone.

«Jenny Lee» exclaimed Trixie but before she could yell at her, Sister Julienne asked

«Jenny where on earth have you been?»

«We've been worried sick young lady» aded Sister Evangelina

«Alec's room» muttered Jenny before going up the stairs to her room. Her words froze the others to the spot.

Sister Evangelina was the first to snap out of it.

«I'm going to talk to her» nobody stopped her, to shocked to do anything.

Knock knock knock

«Come in»

Sister Evangelina pushed the door open.

«Dear Lord Nurse Lee take those clothes of before you catch pneumonia» she exclaimed with all the authority she could manage,

«So what» Her words were barely more then a whisper, but the nun heard them and sadness filed her heart. She approached Jenny and took one of her hands in hers.

«Listen, I more then anyone understand how you feel»

«You do?»

«You feel like you are dead inside. There is no hardship more trying then losing someone you love. I will not say that everything is going to be all right, because it's not» tears fell down the young woman's eyes. The nun held a hand under her chin.

«Jenny the show must go on. You must take it one day at a time. And remember you are not alone» Jenny couldn't take it anymore, she started to weep. Sister Evangelina did something nobody believed possible, she enveloped the broken woman into a warm and powerful embrace.


End file.
